


you don't have to say you love me (you don't have to say nothing)

by callumsmitchells



Category: EastEnders
Genre: 5 times + 1, Fluff, M/M, mutual ilys, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-02
Updated: 2020-01-02
Packaged: 2021-02-25 01:40:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22087948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/callumsmitchells/pseuds/callumsmitchells
Summary: Five times someone tells Ben or Callum that they love each other, and one time they finally say it.
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Comments: 4
Kudos: 160





	you don't have to say you love me (you don't have to say nothing)

**one**

  
“Ben, love, will you do a shift for me at the Prince Albert?” Kathy asked Ben as he stood at the bottom of the stairs, jacket already on, keys dangling in his hand. “I’m two barmen down.” 

  
He was stood with a grin on his face, eyes transfixed on the phone he held in his other hand. He typed out what Kathy presumed was a text, somehow completely to his mum’s desperate pleas.

  
“Ben.” She repeated, more sternly this time. That quickly got his attention. 

  
“What?” He asked, smiling never once fading as he locked his phone and pocketed it. 

  
Kathy sighed, “Will you do a shift for me?” She asked again. 

  
Ben was too excited at the prospect of his day for the grin on his face to waver even remotely. “No can do I’m afraid. Already got plans.” He explained. “Bobby’ll do it. Get him out the house for a bit, plus it’s more pocket money for him.”

  
“What’s got you in a good mood?” Kathy asked as Ben walked into the kitchen, pulling out a bottle of water from the fridge and cereal bar from the cupboard. “Or do I not want to know?” 

  
Ben snorted out a laugh. “Get your mind out the gutter mother, you’re worse than me sometimes! Callum rang last night, if you must know. Asked if I’m free today, I said yeah, so he’s taking me out for the day. Planned it all himself, won’t even give me a clue about what we’re doing.” 

  
Kathy smiled wholeheartedly. _Callum. Of course it was Callum._ “You’re lucky to have that man you know?” 

  
He wraps an arm around his mum, pressing a kiss to her temple. “I know.” Ben confirms. “He makes me happy, and I haven’t felt like that around someone for years. I reckon Cal came into my life at just the right time.” 

  
“You love him.” Kathy enquired. “That’s special.”

  
Ben smiles, his phone vibrating in his jean pocket. “I don’t – _yet_. That’ll be him texting me now.” 

  
Kathy kissed Ben’s cheek, wiping her lipstick stain away from his scrunched up face. “Have fun.” She said. “Tell your Callum I said hello.”

  
**two**

  
In the weeks and months following Ben and Callum sharing their long awaited second kiss, they seemed to be inseparable. Callum would spend days at a time with Ben, at the Beales’ residence, but, feeling that he was outstaying his welcome every single time, he would go back to his flat, followed by Ben, who would then spend days at Callum’s flat. This was something that neither of them ever expected, considering Ben’s past connections and memories with the funeral parlour and connecting flat. Somehow, Ben felt comfortable there. He didn’t feel out of place, or have flashbacks to what seemed like a complete past life that he had. 

  
Ben sat on the sofa, wrapped up in his grey dressing gown, wearing his glasses. The bedroom door opened, and Callum walked out, wearing a hoodie he had stolen from Ben, his hair flat against his head, freshly washed and devoid of any styling products. Ben smiled up at his boyfriend, holding his hand out for Callum to take as he settled down next to Ben.

  
“Ordered us some Indian.” Ben said softly, his thumb rubbing over Callum’s knuckles.

  
Callum smiled at him, leaning forward and taking Ben’s lips in his own, no heat in the embrace, neither of them needing to take it any further. “You’re amazing.” 

  
“Only food.” Ben shrugged, resting his head on Callum’s shoulder.

  
The two of them settled down, watching their latest box set, waiting for the flat bell to go, indicating that their food had arrived. When it did eventually go, Ben untangled himself from Callum and walked downstairs. Stuart walked into the communal room as Ben returned, holding a bag filled with boxes in his hand, a couple of cans of alcohol in the other.

  
“I’ve left some beer downstairs, couldn’t carry them all at once.” He said, putting the boxes on the table in front of the sofa. 

  
Callum nodded, pouting his lips as an indication for Ben to kiss him. Ben complied, of course. When Ben pulled away to walk back downstairs, Stuart remained looking at Callum, somewhat frozen in his stare. He hadn’t seen this before. 

  
“Looks good on you bruv.” Stuart commented, walking over to the fridge to pull his out his own beers. 

  
“What does?” Callum quizzed, opening up the lids to the boxes and silently thanking Ben for getting his favourite. 

  
Stuart grinned, opening his beers. “Being in love.” 

  
Callum shook his head, stupid, disbelieving grin on his face. “Shut up!” He gasped out, scrunching tissues into a ball and throwing it at his brother as he walked out of the room.

  
**three**

  
When Ben first realised he was gay, he never thought he would be able to have a boyfriend, let alone kiss his boyfriend in front of family. A lot had changed in the years between Ben first realising his sexuality and meeting Callum – changes both good and bad. But his family finally accepting him, calling Callum their family too? That was the best change of all. It made them both finally feel accepted into a world that neither of them thought they ever would be.

  
Lola was stood in the kitchen, making up Lexi’s packed lunch and putting it in her school bag. It was a routine she in the morning, regardless of who was taking the girl to school that day. Whilst Lexi was upstairs brushing her teeth, Lola would be cutting sandwiches into triangles and wrapping them in foil. This morning was no different, except instead of having the relaxing sounds of morning radio keeping her company, she had Ben and Callum in the living room. The door separating the living room and the kitchen was wide open, allowing her to see and hear everything that was going on. Ben was sat in his jeans and a shirt, having offered to take Lexi to school. Callum, on the other hand, was dressed in his typical suit, only missing his tie. The rest of the house was quiet, Ian and Bobby still sleeping, Kathy having left an hour or so before to open up the café. 

“I need to go!” Callum giggled out – yes, giggled. 

  
Lola looked through the door to see Ben holding Callum to his lap, Callum with his arms wrapped around Ben’s shoulders, hands clasped at the back of his neck. 

  
“No, you don’t.” Ben grinned, leaning forward and colliding his lips with his boyfriends. “Have the day off, come and take Lex to school with me. Bet all the mums would fancy you in that suit. Know I do.” 

  
Callum sighed, shaking his head with a soft smile. “You’re allowed to fancy me.” He said. “Anyway, I can’t just take today off, I’ve got Mr Stanley’s funeral at eleven.”   
He pressed a kiss to Ben’s lips, unclasping his hands to run his fingers through the back of Ben’s hair. He had no idea when he started to do that, but it relaxed Ben in a way he never thought he would be, as though he was completely captivated, under Callum’s spell as he touched him. Ben smiled into the kiss, fingers rubbing around Callum’s hips. When Callum eventually managed to pull himself away, his fingers remained in Ben’s hair for a few short moments after. Ben, in a state of complete and utter bliss, trailed his head forward, in an attempt to kiss Callum again, but he was too late as Callum stood up and started doing his tie up. 

  
“I’ll text you later, take you out for dinner. And Lex, if that’s okay with you Lo?” He raised his voice slightly at the end. 

  
Lola poked her head around the door, pretending she hadn’t just witnessed the moment that the boys had just shared. “Yeah, that’s fine with me. See you later!”

Callum winked at Ben, and left for work. Lola moved into the living room, putting Lexi’s reading book in her bag. It was her day to swap it out for a new one, a whole new story that Ben could read for her tonight before she fell asleep. Lola smiled at Ben as he looked out of the window, seeing Callum’s figure walk past. 

  
“You love him.” She broke the silence. 

  
Ben’s eyes flashed up to her, soft smile on his face. He didn’t need to say it. She knew. 

  
“Reckon she’s finished brushing her teeth then?”

  
**four**

  
Ben was working away for a few days, having driven all the way up north to a car convention, hoping to secure some contracts with car dealerships in his plans to expand the Walford car lot. He had wanted Callum to go along with him for the trip, especially because a black tie event was included in the trip, but Callum had work commitments with the funeral home. The dead just didn’t stop dying. 

  
“He rang yet?” Jay asked as he walked into the funeral parlour, walking over to the filing cabinet and getting a folder out. 

  
Callum looked at his phone, which was placed on the desk, ready for when he received a message. “Not yet. Said he would the minute he gets settled in the hotel.” 

  
“Sorry you couldn’t go with him Cal,” Jay sympathised. “It’s just chocka here, I wouldn’t have been able to do everything alone.” 

  
“No, no, it’s fine! Ben was annoyed when I first told him, but I promised him a weekend away, just us, in a couple of weeks.” Callum explained. 

  
Jay smiled, looking down at his feet for a moment. “You’re good for him y’know?” He asked. “Between being with you and having Lexi back in his life, I’ve never seen him so settled.”

  
Callum nodded, smiling, understood what Jay was saying. He’d been witness to it himself, fondly remembering the days when Ben would be annoying him, running about and doing sketchy jobs, making way to obvious remarks about Callum’s hidden sexuality that even he was surprised people didn’t catch onto. Whilst Callum was remembering this, his phone buzzed. 

  
_**I’m here now, don’t miss me too much. Ring you later xx** _

  
“He’s there now.” Callum announced, sending a quick text back. 

  
When he had finished texting, he put his phone back on the desk, unlocked. Jay didn’t mean to, but he looked over at it, smiling at Callum’s wallpaper. It was a picture of him and Ben, both of them in bed together, with huge grins across their faces. Ben had his glasses on, both of them with flat hair, and Jay guessed that they had both just woken up. Callum’s nose was pressed against Ben’s cheek, a look of something in his eyes, Ben with his eyes scrunched closed, mid laugh. Callum was also looking at his wallpaper, his eyes illuminated, tears almost forming in his eyes. 

  
“Callum mate,” Jay started, “you’re in love.” 

  
Callum shook his head slightly, trying to prove Jay wrong, maybe even convince himself. Not yet, he thought, can’t be in love yet.

**five**

  
Lexi loved having four parents. Some people may think it might not have worked, having all her mum, dad, Jay and Callum being the parental figures in her life, but she thrived with it. Oftentimes, Lexi would spend evenings with her dad and Callum over at Callum’s flat, getting her out the way of the comings and goings of the Beales’, especially when Jay had taken Lola out for date night. Like tonight. Jay had booked for him and Lola to go and watch a new film, getting the late showing tickets. He had asked if it was okay for Ben and Callum to have Lexi for the night, and of course, they both agreed. Ben had brought Lexi around after school, Ben carrying her overnight bag as Lexi held on tightly to her favourite teddies, surmising that she couldn’t only bring one, because then the others would feel lonely. 

  
“Cal, I got my board games!” she shouted as Ben pushed open the flat door for her. 

  
Callum grinned, picking her up and spinning her around as she cuddled him. “All ready for me to thrash you and daddy then?” 

  
“Never!” she giggled, throwing her head back. “What are we having to eat?”

  
“Pizza?” Ben quizzed, looking between his daughter and his boyfriend to see if that was fine. When they both nodded, he opened his phone to order their favourites. 

  
“Snakes and Ladders first?” Callum asked, getting the box out and setting it up on the desk for them. Lexi jumped up onto a chair, sitting patiently as Callum finished sorting the board game out. 

  
Ben walked over to them, resting his hand on Callum’s shoulder. “It’ll be about 20 minutes.” Ben confirmed. “That okay with you princess?”

  
“Yes daddy!” Lexi grinned. 

  
All three of them sat down, playing Snakes and Ladders as they waited for their pizza to be delivered. It’s something they did often, various other members of families sometimes joining in. Lexi was very competitive when it came to board games, which was a trait she had definitely gained from both her mother and father, Callum quickly learned. 

  
“I win!” Lexi shouted, as the game reached its conclusion. 

  
Callum sat back with a smirk on his face, admiring how happy she was to have beat them. Ben on the other hand, lived up to his competitive nature and, aghast, complained. “You cheated!” 

  
“How do you cheat at Snakes and Ladders?” Callum asked, his hand on the back of Ben’s neck, playing with the short hair that is situated there. 

  
“I know for a fact she didn’t roll a six on that dice.” Ben explained. 

  
Callum pressed a kiss to Ben’s cheek. “Look how happy she is though.” He whispered, closing his sentence with another short peck to the skin. 

  
“Don’t care.” Ben pouted. Callum leaned forward and kissed Ben’s lips softly. “Pizza’s here.” 

  
Ben ran downstairs to get the pizzas for them as Callum poured Lexi some orange juice and grabbed him and Ben some beer. 

  
“Cheers babe.” Ben said as Callum put the alcohol down in front of him, opening up the pizza boxes as Lexi waited impatiently to get the first slice. 

  
The three of them sat in a comfortable silence as they ate, the television providing their soundtrack of the evening. Lexi was placed in between both Ben and Callum, and as she finished swallowing her third slice. “Daddy?” she said, like she was asking a question.

  
“Yeah baby?” he asked, wiping his fingers clean of grease for the umpteenth time.  
“You know how mummy and Uncle Jay love each other?” She enquired.

  
Ben nodded in response, not knowing where this was heading. 

  
“Do you and Callum love each other too?” Lexi innocently asked. 

  
Callum, not expecting that question to come out of the little girls mouth at all, choked on his food, completely shocked. Ben looked at Callum, whispering out a “You okay?”, to which Callum nodded.

  
“Me and Callum like each other a lot, yeah. Like mummy and Uncle Jay.” Ben explained, not saying the other ‘L word’. “Is that okay princess?” 

  
Lexi nodded, accepting that answer, before picking up another slice. 

  
**\+ one**

  
They had recently decided to start doing monthly date nights, providing some solitude for the pair of them. It was half to make up for how long it took for them to finally go on their first official date that worked out, half because they barely got any alone time, what with them both sharing houses with other people. By setting a date night each month, it allowed for them to go out for the evening, or kick others out of the house for a few hours, bribing them with money for the Vic. 

  
Ben walked into Callum’s flat, undoing his coat and shrugging it off his shoulders. Callum was in the kitchen, having texted Ben to say he was cooking for their date night. He had kicked Stuart out for the night, and so they were free to spend alone time together. Ben walked over to Callum, wrapping his arms around Callum’s waist, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. 

  
“Smells amazing.” Ben admired, laying his head on Callum’s back, smiling when he started to hear Callum’s heart beating. 

  
“Making your favourite.” Callum said. “Spag bol.” 

  
Ben sighed gently. 

  
Callum twisted under Ben’s hold, facing him for the first time. “Gimme a kiss.” Callum commanded softly, hooking his finger under Ben’s chin, tilting it upwards. Ben grinned, pressing his lips to Callum’s, their bodies intertwining. 

  
Ben pulled away with a sigh, his arms still wrapped around Callum, Callum’s arms still wrapped around him. They were in such close proximity with one another, Ben couldn’t help but notice Callum’s features. How he had freckles that weren’t usually obvious; how the red of his lips suddenly seemed more vibrant after they had shared a kiss; how when Callum started blushing, it was usually his ears that went red first; how blue his eyes are, but also with flecks of green and gold mixed in. He spoke without realising what he was about to say. 

  
“I love you.” 

  
It’s such a simple sentence, but it’s a statement with an incredibly large impact. It changed lives. 

  
Callum’s grasp on Ben felt weaker now, his ears flushing red, and then his cheeks quickly following, pink spreading across his skin. 

  
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” Ben ranted out as he made an attempted to fill the void left by what he hoped would be filled with Callum saying it back. “I’m just being stupid.”

  
Suddenly, Callum’s eyes flickered down to Ben’s open lips, quickly pushing his lips to fit between Ben’s. It was a passionate embrace, one that just worked, especially after what Ben had just admitted. Callum was sure he felt a tear drop from Ben’s closed eyes, colliding where their skin pressed together. 

  
When they eventually pulled apart, Callum cupped Ben’s face with his hands as he spoke. “You’re not stupid.” He said. “I just wasn’t expecting it. Y’know, that was the first time someone said that to me and I can truly feel it back. I love you Ben Mitchell, so much.” 


End file.
